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If it is consenting adults and a civil contract who cares; govt stay out. The key is “consenting adults”. Yes it is reasonable to recognize marriages performed as a church as a legal matter. That same legal right should apply to other couples.
As for the Obama thing; I thought polls showed that new voters (all races) who voted for Obama voted against the amendment. The idea that a black candidate brought this down is only reasonable if enough new black voters were attracted to the polls to put it over the top. It is not clear that this in fact happened and it may have been a wider margin without Obama driven votes. Same result may have occurred even if Hillary ran.